Review: The Bad News Bears (1976)

USA/C-102m./Dir: Michael Ritchie/Wr: Bill Lancaster/Cast: Walter Matthau (Coach Morris Buttermaker), Tatum O’Neal (Amanda Whurlitzer), Chris Barnes (Tanner Boyle), Vic Morrow (Coach Roy Truner), Jackie Earle Haley (Kelly Leak), Joyce Van Patton (Cleveland), Gary Lee Cavagnaro (Engelberg), Erin Blunt (Ahmad Abdul Rahim), Quinn Smith (Timmy Lupus)

The original 1976 version of The Bad News Bears is one of the most beloved family films of all time, despite the fact that it features alcoholism, vulgar and racist language, under-age smoking and drinking, and borderline physical and emotional abuse. Let just say, Mary Poppins it ain’t. What it is instead is a well-drawn, realistic slice-of-life that will have you rooting for the underdog.

Walter Matthau stars as Morris Buttermaker, a booze-sodden, ex-minor league ball player who agrees to take beer money in exchange for coaching a rag-tag group of no-talent little leaguers. The kids learn little initially from their new coach, except how to pass out after consuming copious quantities of martinis and Miller Beer. Consequently, the team suffers an ignoble slaughter during their first game. Faced with possibly disbanding the team, Buttermaker decides to recruit a couple of ringers, beginning with the daughter of an ex-girlfriend (Tatum O’Neal), who possesses a wicked pitching arm. The new-and-improved Bears enjoy a string of successes, but fun takes a backset to the quest for victory.

Michael Ritchie’s film succeeds largely because it sidesteps most of the sentimentalism and clichés that usually accompany underdog sports stories; and unlike most family films made today, it trusts in the intelligence of its audience. The script by Bill Lancaster (Burt’s son) is smart and doesn’t feel that it has to spell everything out. For example, during the final game, when Buttermaker realizes he is taking the championship way too seriously, there is no apology or explanatory speech. The change of heart simply plays out on Matthau’s face.

The performances by the child cast are nearly as good as those of Matthau, Morrow, and the other professional actors; and the use of overlapping dialogue (which must have required a lot of rehearsal time with the kids) gives the scenes a naturalist feel. While Tatum O’Neal and Jackie Earl Haley are usually singled out amongst the child actors (and they are quite good), the real standout is Chris Barnes as Tanner Boyle, a tough-talking pipsqueak who refers to the coach as an “alky crud” and uses racial slurs for his fellow players. Barnes is totally believable as an insecure kid trying to cover his lack of confidence by acting out.

The Bad News Bears has a raw and realistic feel that roots the film strongly in the Seventies alongside the work of filmmakers like Robert Altman and Hal Ashby. At the same time, the story is timeless. Like a classic cocktail, this concoction will be enjoyed for generations to come.

Drinks Consumed--Cheap beer of all kinds, Jim Beam bourbon, and martinis (gin)

Intoxicating Effects--Sneaking sips, staggering, and passing out

Potent Quotables--OFFSCREEN BEAR TEAMMATE (concerning the passed out Buttermaker): What do we do?
ENGELBERG: Nothing. He ain’t any good to us sober either.
REGI TOWER: Opening day’s tomorrow. We don’t know what the batting order is. We don’t even have our positions set or anything.
TANNER: All we got is a cruddy alky for a manager!

Video Availability--The Bad News Bears is available as a standalone DVD or packaged with its sequels as Bad News Bears Triple Play 3-Pack (Paramount).

Similarly Sauced Cinema--The Bad News Bears inspired two sequels without the boozy Buttermaker; and Billy Bob Thornton put his spin on the role of Buttermaker in a pretty good 2005 remake.

BAD NEWS BEARS DELUXE JERSEY COSTUME SIZE ADULT WITH HAT & BELT

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Booze News: Summer Soused Cinema Schedule

Set your phasers on stun and break out the Romulan ale, because with the release of J.J. Abrams Star Trek sequel/reboot, the summer movie season is officially underway. The new Star Trek film is indeed a hoot, and there are several other flicks waiting in the wings that promise to include significant booze-centric content. Here's a quick rundown by release date:

May 8th - Tilda Swinton stars as a down-on-her-luck alky who becomes embroiled in a kidnapping plot in Julia.



June 5th - The director of Old School presents The Hangover. I'm rooting for this one, because I'd like to see Zach Galifianakis have a breakout hit.



July 10th - The hilarious, Thurber Award-winning book, I Love You, Beth Cooper gets the big screen treatment. And what's a teen comedy without under-aged drinking? By the way, the book is one of the funniest I've ever read. It's like a John Hughes movie, except good.



August 7th - Meryl Streep portrays Julia Child in Julie and Julia. Let's add a little more wine. Bon appétit!

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Review: The Booze Hangs High (1930)

USA/B&W-6m./Dir: Hugh Harman & Rudolph Isling/Cast: Bosko (Carmen Maxwell), Papa Pig (Uncredited), Piglets (Uncredited)

Many of the funniest and most memorable cartoon characters in motion picture history sprang from the animation division of Warner Brothers studios--Bugs Bunny, Daffy Duck, Porky Pig, and Wile E. Coyote, just to name a few. However, a decade before the boys at “Termite Terrace” brought those classic characters to life, Warner Brothers introduced Bosco, the very first Looney Tunes star.

In his first couple of shorts it was obvious that Bosko was intended to be a racial stereotype of an African-American boy, with features based on the blackface makeup popularized in minstrel shows of the 1910’s and 20’s. However, as the series continued, the offensive origin of Bosko became less obvious, and the high-voiced character began to more closely resemble Mickey Mouse without the large ears. The transformation was more or less complete by the fifth Bosko cartoon (and the first with an alcohol-related theme), The Booze Hangs High.

As with many cartoons of the time, there is little plot to The Booze Hangs High. Bosko and various farm animals dance, laugh, and bounce in time to the musical score. That’s more or less it. However, the short gets interesting around the half way mark. Bosko feeds his pigs, and the piglets discover a bottle of hooch mixed in with their slop. One of the piglets uses its curly tail as a corkscrew to open the bottle, and the under-aged hogs drink themselves sappy. Papa Pig catches the pair of potted piglets, but instead of scolding them, he gets stewed himself. When the elder pig tosses the bottle, Bosko gets hit with the remains of the liquor. Instantly drunk, the farmer joins the swine in a chorus of “Sweet Adeline.”

The Booze Hangs High is nowhere near as funny as the classic Looney Tunes that would follow, and of course, Bosko’s racist origins are troubling. Today, The Booze Hangs High is best viewed as an interesting historical artifact from a time when America’s racial attitudes were less sophisticated and when animals bounced in time with music.

One interesting note--When Nickelodeon aired this cartoon on television, it censored a moment when Papa Pig drunkenly regurgitates a corncob.

Drinks Consumed--Triple-X hooch (likely whiskey)

Intoxicating Effects--Hiccups, the giggles, staggering, belching, vomiting, and harmonizing

Potent Quotables--There’s no dialogue in this one, apart from the chorus of “Sweet Adeline.”

Video Availability--Available as part of the Looney Tunes - Golden Collection, Vol. 6 (Warner Home Video). This public domain short is also provided in its entirety above.

Similarly Sauced Cinema--Early animated star Felix the Cat got high on hooch in the silent short Felix the Cat Woos Whoopee (1928).

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Review: Bottle Shock (2008)

USA/C-110m./Dir: Randall Miller/Wr: Jody Savin, Randall Miller, & Ross Schwartz/Cast: Alan Rickman (Steven Spurrier), Chris Pine (Bo Barrett), Bill Pullman (Jim Barrett), Rachael Taylor (Sam), Freddy Rodriguez (Gustavo Brambila), Dennis Farina (Maurice), and Eliza Dushku (Joe the bartender)

If you walk down the wine aisles of any liquor store, you will spot labels that originate from all continents and countries--from Africa to America to Argentina to Australia (and those are just the “A”s). However, there was a time when the vineyards of France dominated wine culture and sales. That mindset changed dramatically after the “Judgment of Paris,” a blind taste test between the top wines of France and California’s Napa Valley that took place in 1976. The story of how that competition came together and the shocking result is recounted in the 2008 indie Bottle Shock.

Alan Rickman stars as Steven Spurrier, an English wine snob with a failing wine shop in Paris. Although his business is well-stocked with the best-reviewed bottles, Spurrier can’t seem to draw customers into his establishment. With the help of a neighboring store owner (Dennis Farina), he strikes upon the idea of using America’s bicentennial as an excuse for hosting a head-to-head contest between the best wines of France and the wines of the upstart California vineyards of Napa Valley. Of course, until he travels to the States, Spurrier never imagines that the American vintners have any possibility of winning.

The film alternates between Spurrier’s fish-out-of-water excursion to California and the story of one of the California vintners, Jim Barrett (Bill Pullman) of the Chateau Montelena vineyard. Barrett is an ex-businessman trying to make a living at something he loves, while struggling with mounting bills and difficulty relating to his unfocused, hippie son Bo (Chris Pine). With so much screen time devoted to the family business at Chateau Montelena, there is little doubt where this underdog tale is headed.

Bottle Shock is the kind of personal, feel-good indie that simply screams “unexceptional.” It’s not a bad film. It is competently written and directed, and it provides a pleasant diversion for 110 minutes. Unfortunately, the story holds few surprises (except for the brief, intriguing mystery of brown wine) and the presentation is straightforward and unimaginative. Still, there are worse ways to waste a couple of hours, and the film does contain some excellent acting, especially from the always-reliable Alan Rickman and from the greatly underrated Bill Pullman*. All in all, Bottle Shock is a cocktail that is easy to swallow but instantly forgettable.

*If you don’t know how good Pullman can be, you need to rent Zero Effect (1998).

Drinks Consumed--Wine (Chardonnay, Cabernet Sauvignon, Pinot Noir, and others) and beer

Intoxicating Effects--Slurred speech and soused sex

Potent Quotables--SPURRIER: We have shattered the myth of the invincible French vine. And not just in California. We’ve opened the eyes of the world.
MAURICE: And you know what I say? I say amen to that, brother.
SPURRIER: You mark my words. We’ll be drinking wines from… well, South America, Australia, New Zealand, Africa, India, China. This is not the end, Maurice. This is just the beginning. (Pouring wine) Welcome to the future.
MAURICE: A’ salùte.

Video Availability--Bottle Shock DVD (Fox)

Similarly Sauced Cinema--For a better wine-centric flick, see Sideways (2004).

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Booze News: Booze Movies Gets a Facelift & a New URL!

Greetings fellow inebriates,

Welcome to the NEW Booze Movies: The 100 Proof Film Guide! You probably noticed that the site has a new look. We also have a new URL. We can now be found at http://www.boozemovies.com/. Of course, the old blogspot address will automatically transfer to the new site, so there is no reason to change any links or saved favorites.

Giving the site a facelift has taken me a couple of weeks, because I've had to revisit every post I've made in the past. While I was fixing the layout of each post, I added extra images, links, videos, and labels. Consequently, Booze Movies is better looking and more functional than ever! You'll notice that now there is a label link bar under the header, which will allow you to quickly jump to the latest "reviews," "news," "toasts," etc. Also, the images in the second column are direct links to some of the most iconic films in soused cinema history.

With the construction behind me, it's time to move forward. Starting next weekend (or earlier), I'll be back to my regular routine of posting liquor-centric film reviews, news, and more. Thanks for your patience while I revamped the site.

Cheers,
garv

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Cinematic Cocktails: Panther Pilsner Beer

In Beer Barrel Polecats (1946) we receive instruction on the art of home brewing from brewmeisters Moe, Larry, and Curly. Following (more or less) the recipe set forth in the manual “How to Make Panther Pilsner Beer by J. Panther Pilsner,” the Stooges share much of the recipe with the audience:

MOE (reading): In order to make ten gallons of beer, pour one can of hopes…
LARRY: Hops.
MOE: Hops… and a can of malt into a large crook…
LARRY: Crock.
MOE: Crock! Then fill crock with hot water.
CURLY: Hot water! Hotsy totsy!

Moe opens the malt and Larry opens the hops. Unfortunately, they put Curly in charge of the hot water, which results in Moe receiving a burned back as he continues reading the recipe: “Mix ingredients. Refer to page 27--Yow-wow-wowwww!”

After the boys mix the ingredients, Moe continues: “Put in three cakes of yeast.” He orders Larry to add the yeast, but Larry is called away to the phone. Consequently, Moe adds the yeast himself. When Moe is also drawn away to the phone, Larry returns to the brew and adds the three cakes of yeast as previously instructed. Curly also adds the yeast when Larry leaves the kitchen to grab the beer bottles. However, Curly doesn’t bother to first remove the paper wrapper from the cakes, and he throws the shopping bag into the crock for good measure. One assumes that there were additional steps to the recipe, but we’ll never know, because the Stooges were too distracted contending with the overflowing, yeasty mixture to continue reading the instructions.

One final note--After bottling the beer, be sure to keep the bottles far away from heat or an open flame, because Panther Pilsner Beer is highly explosive.

3 Stooges Beer Adult T-Shirt

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Review: Beer Barrel Polecats (1946)

USA/B&W-15m./Dir: Jules White/Wr: Gilbert W. Pratt/Cast: Moe Howard (Moe), Larry Fine (Larry), Curly Howard (Curly), Vernon Dent (Warden)

The Three Stooges often recycled plotlines, gags, and archive footage while producing their 190 short subjects. However, fans of the 6-man trio can often identify a specific short based upon a single bit of business or line of dialogue. For example, die hard Stoogeaphiles would have little trouble naming the shorts associated with the phrases “Maha? Ah ha!” “Hold hands, you lovebirds,” or “We all put the yeast in.” The last classic quote originates from one of Curly’s final films with the team, Beer Barrel Polecats. Unfortunately, beyond that memorable line, the short has little to recommend it.

As the short begins, the Stooges have visited sixteen saloons and have been unable to find a single bottle of beer. Naturally, they decide to mix up their own home brew, and mix it up they do when each of the boys unknowingly adds the yeast to the concoction (Curly doesn’t even bother to unwrap the cakes of yeast, and he throws in the shopping bag as well). After Curly sells a bottle of the extra yeasty brew to a plainclothes detective, the boys end up in prison, where they get in even more hot water when it’s discovered that beer-crazy Curly smuggled in a keg under his coat (with the unlikely excuse that the bulge was a goiter). Forty years later, the Stooges are released from prison, but Moe and Larry make the guards take Curly back when he reveals that the first thing he plans to do is get his hands on a bottle of beer.

Beer Barrel Polecats was produced around the time that Curly suffered a series of minor strokes, and his illness is evident in his appearance and performance. He looks haggard and noticeably thinner, his timing is slower, and he doesn’t quite sound like the character that we know and love (his tone of voice fluctuates between being too high or too low). Despite his poor health, Curly gives a passable performance, and Larry picks up much of the slack by taking more than his normal share of physical abuse. Consequently, the newly filmed scenes play better than one would expect.

What really hurts Beer Barrel Polecats is that the second half of the film is made up almost entirely of excerpts from the previous Stooge shorts, In the Sweet Pie and Pie (1941) and So Long Mr. Chumps (1941). Columbia’s shorts department had previously reused footage as a cost-cutting measure, so it made sense to employ the practice on Beer Barrel Polecats to give the ailing Curly a break from filming. However, the excerpted prison footage, filmed five years earlier with a heavier and healthier Curly, only helped to emphasize Curly’s illness in the new segments. What’s more, the old scenes were inserted so sloppily into the story that it ceased to make any sense. First the boys lament that they are about to be hung (In the Sweet Pie and Pie), which seems a very harsh sentence for smuggling a keg into jail. Then, with no explanation, their prison numbers change (So Long Mr. Chumps), and they are looking for Prisoner #41144 with plans to bust him out. Finally, in newly filmed footage, the boys are released from jail, with no mention of their prior death sentence.

Beer Barrel Polecats contains a few enjoyable moments during the beer-making scenes. However, Curly’s poor health and the slapdash use of archive footage spoil this brew.

P.S.--The other quotes mentioned in the review above come from Three Little Pirates (“Maha? Ah hah!”) and Brideless Groom (“Hold hands, you lovebirds.”), both much better shorts than Beer Barrel Polecats.

Drinks Consumed--Panther Pilsner Beer (consumed off-screen)

Intoxicating Effects--Jail time

Potent Quotables--CURLY: That’s it, the last one--one hundred and eighty-five bottles of beer!
MOE: We ain’t gonna run short of beer! Look at those bottles of beer! Hundreds of bottles of beer! Beer to swim in, beer to bathe in… We can wash our clothes in beer!
LARRY: We got beer galore!

Video Availability-- On DVD as part of The Three Stooges Collection, Vol. 5 (1946 - 1948).

Similarly Sauced Cinema--The Stooges try bootlegging imitation scotch in their first booze-centric short, Pardon My Scotch (1935).

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