Review: Izzy & Moe (1985)

USA/TV/C-92m./Dir: Jackie Cooper/Wr: Steven Patrick Bell & Robert Boris/Cast: Jackie Gleason (Izzy Einstein), Art Carney (Moe Smith), Cynthia Harris (Dallas Carter), Zohra Lampert (Esther Einsein), Drew Snyder (Agent Harris), Dick Latessa (Lt. Murphy)

Although Prohibition was reviled by the majority of the American public, Prohibition agents Isadore Einstein and Moe Smith were a couple of the best-loved personalities of the time. From 1920 to 1925, the middle-aged, overweight duo managed to gain entrance to speakeasies and score arrests while trimmer colleagues failed, because they didn’t look like federal agents. The fame the boys gained through newspaper accounts of their exploits didn’t impair their arrest record. The pudgy pair simply donned disguises and used fake accents to eventually arrest over 4,000 suspected bootleggers and to impound an estimated 5,000,000 bottles of hooch. In the realm of buzzkillers, Izzy and Moe rank very near the top.

Jackie Gleason and Art Carney of The Honeymooners fame saw the story of Izzy & Moe as a perfect vehicle to reunite one last time in front of television cameras. Being a fan of much of their previous work, it pains me to say that Izzy & Moe simply isn’t very good. One would think it impossible to take the story of the exceedingly colorful Prohibition characters and turn it into a bland, predictable bore, but the producers of the telefilm did just that. The film has very little humor, no dramatic impetus, and terrible production values (even by TV movie standards).

Gleason and Carney try hard to make the most of the miserable material, and occasionally there are glimmers of their old magic. In fact, the first part of the film plays like a variation on Kramden trying to talk Norton into a new get-rich-quick scheme. Unfortunately, the dramatic scenes involving Izzy’s family are as lifeless and stilted as a grade school production of Our Town; and the gangland scenes convey no sense of menace. In short, the film is as dry as a gin mill after a raid by the two title characters.

Drinks Consumed--Whiskey, beer, and wine

Intoxicating Effects--Staggering, belching, and sneaking sips

Potent Quotables--Izzy (referring to his partner in drag): Hey, buddy, can I get a drink? That is a very ugly woman.

Video Availability--Izzy and Moe DVD (Universal)

Similarly Sauced Cinema--Jimmy Durante portrayed a dynamic Prohibition agent of the Izzy & Moe variety in the message-drenched melodrama The Wet Parade (1932).

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Booze News: McLovin Me Some Superbad!

It’s been a great summer for comedies. Both Hot Fuzz and Knocked Up were smart, well-made, laugh-out-loud flicks, but neither can claim the crown as the funniest film of summer 2007. That title goes to Superbad, a celebration of horny adolescence.

The script by Knocked Up’s Seth Rogen and his buddy Evan Goldberg is the story of a couple of unpopular high-schoolers (coincidentally named Seth and Evan) and their quest to obtain alcohol to impress the ladies at an end-of-the-year blowout. The screenplay is truthful about the fears and urges of high school boys, and the cast is note perfect. Jonah Hill manages to bring a certain sweetness to the heavy, foul-mouthed Seth; and nobody is better at awkward discomfort than Michael Cera (as Arrested Development fans can attest).

In short, I don’t think I laughed this hard since Bad Santa (2003). Superbad earns Booze Movie’s highest recommendation!

Parents be warned--Superbad is R-rated for a reason. This film is vulgar in the extreme. Shortly after Mrs. Boozemovies and I found our seats, some guy walked into the theater with five kids ranging in age from eight to thirteen. Turning to my wife, I said, “I sure hope those kids like dick jokes.”

Cheers,
garv

Superbad: The Drawings (Hardcover)

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Review: Tales of Terror (1962)

USA/C-89m./Dir: Roger Corman/Wr: Richard Matheson/Cast: Vincent Price (Fortunato Luchresi), Peter Lorre (Montresor Herringbone), Joyce Jameson (Annabel Herringbone)

In 1960, Vincent Price starred in House of Usher for low-budget auteur Roger Corman, and the success of that project led American International Pictures to embark upon a series of gothic horrors adapted from the works of Edgar Allan Poe. When it came time for the fourth Price/Corman/Poe collaboration, there was a need to freshen up the cocktail, so Tales of Terror was conceived as an anthology film, featuring a trilogy of stories from the morbid author. The first and last tales are fairly standard mixtures of blood, cobwebs, and melodrama; but the center story, “The Black Cat,” is overflowing with both wine and laughs.

“The Black Cat” segment (actually based primarily on Poe’s “The Cask of Amontillado”) tells the story of Montresor Herringbone (Peter Lorre), an out-of-work lush who sponges off his wife (Joyce Jameson) to supply the money for his vino habit. After being tossed out of his regular watering hole, Herringbone stumbles upon a wine merchant’s convention, where a connoisseur, Fortunato Luchresi (Price), is about to display his unsurpassed wine tasting talents. Herringbone insists that he can out-taste any so-called expert, so he challenges Luchresi to a taste-off. The contest ends in a draw and an extremely pickled Herringbone, but things take a dark turn when Luchresi takes a liking to Herringbone’s wife.

The wine drinking contest is the highlight of the film, due largely to Lorre’s ad-libs and Price’s fey mannerisms. Roger Corman brought in a real wine expert to demonstrate the proper tasting technique, and then allowed his stars to perform the scene as they saw fit. Price followed the expert’s technique step-by-step but exaggerated each gesture to hilarious effect. Lorre’s guzzling and improvised dialogue provided the perfect counterpoint.

All in all, “The Black Cat” segment is a small gem, marred only by modern editing techniques which occasionally spoil the period feel of the piece. If you are looking for another wino film to complement Sideways (2004), give Tales of Terror a spin.

Drinks Consumed--Wine

Intoxicating Effects--Staggering, hiccups, belching, harmonizing, bickering, destruction of property, passing out, delirium tremens, boasting, and bar-tossed

Potent Quotables--MONTRESOR: Give me my money!
ANNABEL: There is none, Montresor. You haven’t worked in 17 years.
MONTRESOR: Will you--Has it been that long? Oh, stop your silly tactics. What about your sewing money?
ANNABEL: We need that for food.
MONTRESOR: Food--That’s exactly what I want it for. I drink my food.

Video Availability--Available as a Midnite Movies Double Feature DVD with Twice Told Tales (MGM) and as part of the Vincent Price: MGM Scream Legends Collection

Similarly Sauced Cinema--Price, Lorre, and Jameson re-teamed for The Comedy of Terrors (1964), except that time around Price played the lush.

Vincent Price: The Art of Fear (Paperback)

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Review: The Big Hangover (1950)

USA/B&W-82m./Dir: Norman Krasna/Wr: Norman Krasna/Cast: Van Johnson (David Muldon), Elizabeth Taylor (Mary Belney), Percy Waram (John Belney), Gene Lockhart (Charles Parkford), Edgar Buchanan (Uncle Fred Mahoney), Leon Ames (Carl Bellcap)

The best thing about The Big Hangover is its title. It’s a damn good title, evocative of rain-swept city streets, empty bottles, shady characters, and broken dreams--everything that you would expect from a pitch-black film noir. Unfortunately, The Big Hangover isn’t a noir film, nor is it particularly good.

It starts with an interesting and somewhat strange premise. Van Johnson plays David Muldon, a law school valedictorian starting out at a prestigious law firm. Muldon is also a WWII veteran, and he suffers from a strange form of combat fatigue. He nearly drowned when being submerged in 100 year-old brandy during an air raid, and from that point forward, the slightest taste or even the smell of alcohol makes him instantaneously drunk. Liz Taylor plays the daughter of the law firm’s senior partner. She takes a shine to David, and being that she is an amateur psychiatrist (isn’t that convenient), she takes it upon herself to cure him.

I think The Big Hangover is supposed to be a romantic comedy, except it doesn’t happen to be very funny. Any humor is far outweighed by soapy melodrama. There’s also a secondary subplot about an Asian couple who are refused residence in an apartment building due to discrimination, which is much more interesting than Van and Liz’s story. Regrettably, the subplot is handled in as hamfisted a manner as the comedy, and it is never fully developed or resolved.

On the plus side, the cast is likable, and the acting is professional all around (except Johnson does a terrible drunk). Although the movie itself isn’t very good, it’s worth seeing for the bizarro storyline. Still, I hope that someday someone swipes the superb title and attaches it to the alcohol-drenched crime film it deserves.

Drinks Consumed--Spiked punch, brandy, Scotch, and wine

Intoxicating Effects--Dizziness, sneaking sips, hearing voices, harmonizing, and loosened inhibitions

Potent Quotables--DAVID (handed a drink): I’m getting like that fellow in The Lost Weekend.
MARY: There aren’t ten drops in that glass. Drink it.

Video Availability--The Big Hangover is available as a manufacture-on-demand DVD-R through The Warner Archive.

Similarly Sauced Cinema--It was Liz’s turn to hit the bottle in Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf? (1966).

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Review: Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981)

USA/C-115m./Dir: Steven Spielberg/Wr: Lawrence Kasden/Cast: Harrison Ford (Indiana Jones), Karen Allen (Marion Ravenwood), Paul Freeman (Dr. Rene Belloq), John Rhys-Davies (Sallah), Denholm Elliot (Dr. Marcus Brody), Ronald Lacey (Toht)

I know what you’re thinking--“Raiders of the Lost Ark? Booze Movie?” It is indeed. While most firewater-fueled films feature immoderate drinking throughout, others earn their place in the soused cinema canon on the merits of a single character or a lone liquor-laced scene that is utterly unforgettable and iconic. Raiders of the Lost Ark falls within the latter category, as it contains the most memorable drinking contest sequence in film history.

Although Harrison Ford’s archeologist/adventurer, Indiana Jones, is the center of the movie, it is his love interest, Marion Ravenwood (Karen Allen), the hard-drinking daughter of Indy’s mentor, who is most intriguing from an alky perspective. We are introduced to her character inside her bar in Nepal where she is engaged in a drinking contest with a tub of lard three times her size. They take turns downing whiskey shots, and from the empty glasses overturned on the table, it is obvious that they are well into the battle. The rotund challenger shallows his drink without much trouble and the focus turns to Marion. She slowly empties her glass but then begins to falter. The wagerers are certain the game is over and money begins to change hands, but then Marion steadies herself and places her empty glass face down upon the table. The tubby challenger again takes his turn and passes out upon consuming the golden liquid.

Marion also proves that her thirst and capacity for booze are central character traits during a few other moments scattered throughout the movie. For example, she takes time to drink from a punctured keg in the middle of a shootout in her bar, and when captured by the Nazis, her first question to her captors is “Whatta ya got to drink around here?” However, Marion is never a sloppy drunk. She can put away liquor with the best of them and holds it like a champ. She may be the perfect woman.

Of course, the film itself receives my highest recommendation. Steven Spielberg and George Lucas’ homage to the heroes of the 1930’s movie serials and pulp magazines is quite possibly the most enjoyable adventure film ever produced. Unfortunately, they didn’t see fit to bring Karen Allen back for the first two Indiana Jones sequels, and those films are drier (in all senses of the term) because of that decision.

Drinks Consumed--Whiskey, beer, and unknown wine or liquor (Belloq's family label)

Intoxicating Effects--Passing out, slurred speech, and the giggles

Potent Quotables--(Final line of the film) MARION (to Indy): Come on. Buy you a drink? You know, a drink?

Video Availability--Raiders is available as a solo DVD or as part of Indiana Jones - The Complete Adventure Collection (Paramount).

Similarly Sauced Cinema--Karen Allen returned as Marion Ravenwood in Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, but alas, she didn't drink a drop.

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Booze News: Mad for Mad Men

This is slightly off-topic--it's not soused cinema but it is tipsy TV--but what I've seen thus far is very, very good, so AMC's Mad Men deserves a plug.

If you long for the days of the the Rat Pack, the office bottle, smoke-filled rooms, and full-figured women, Mad Men is the show for you! However, this one-hour drama set in the world of Madison Avenue circa 1960 isn't idealized nostalgia. The creator, Matthew Weiner (a writing staff alum of The Sopranos and Andy Richter Controls the Universe), isn't shy about shining a light on backward attitudes of the time such as racism and sexism. Furthermore, with the world of advertising as a backdrop, misrepresentations, moral shakiness, and outright lies are just part of a day at the office.

The show has a cinematic feel, and despite the lack of nudity and profanity, it feels much more like an HBO series than something produced by AMC. The writing is strong, and there's plenty for booze movie enthusiasts to enjoy...

"Should we drink before the meeting or after... or both?"

There are a number of opportunities to catch a rebroadcast of the first episode before episode two premieres Thursday at 10pm EST. Here's a link to the show schedule on AMC's Website: Mad Men schedule. The show is also available for download and On Demand.

Cheers,
garv

Mad Men - Season One (DVD)
Mad Men - Season One [Blu-ray]
Mad Men: Season 2 (DVD)
Mad Men: Season Two [Blu-ray]

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Review: Days of Wine and Roses (1962)

USA/B&W-117m./Dir: Blake Edwards/Wr: J.P. Miller/Cast: Jack Lemmon (Joe Clay), Lee Remick (Kirsten Arnesen Clay), Charles Bickford (Ellis Arnesen), Jack Klugman (Jim Hungerford)

It’s a sad truth, but some people just shouldn’t drink. While many individuals can enjoy a few slugs in the evening and even an occasional debauch with little negative impact, others let the bottle get the best of them. Many films have explored the dangers of too much of a good thing, but none better illustrates the hazards serious alcohol addiction than Blake Edwards’ cinematic bummer Days of Wine and Roses.

The story, adapted from a Playhouse 90 television script, centers around Joe Clay (Jack Lemmon), a public relations man who takes social drinking with his business clients a bit too far. Through work, Joe meets Kirsten, a secretary with a strong sweet tooth who is lured to drink when Joe introduces her to the Brandy Alexander. The two get married, have a child, and quickly let liquor seize control of their lives. After many false starts, Joe eventually dries out with the help of an AA sponsor (Jack Klugman), but Kirsten can’t elude the strong grip of demon alcohol.

Jack Lemmon gives one of his very best performances as Clay. Whether sober, intoxicated, or suffering violent bouts of delirium tremens, his acting always rings true. Although Lemmon does most of the heavy lifting, Remick acquits herself quite well in the less showy role of Kirsten. Charles Bickford as Kirsten’s father (the same role he played in the original TV production) and Jack Klugman lend fine support. Klugman should be singled out for managing to bring a sense of heart and realism to a poorly-written character, forced to spout mouthfuls of clunky expositional dialogue.

Days of Wine and Roses is an important film and it is undeniably well made, but is it entertainment? I’d argue “no.” Other “booze=bad” films like The Lost Weekend (1945) and Leaving Las Vegas (1995) tempered their sermonizing with humor and touches of escapism. Edward’s film provides no respite from the gloom. Even the early scenes, where Joe and Kirsten are infatuated with drink and each other, ooze with seediness. Compared with other alcoholism films, Days of Wine and Roses may be a more truthful, but it is difficult to enjoy a story that is so relentlessly downbeat. It is a bitter brew that should be sampled once, but it is doubtful that you will want to tap into the barrel again. In short, it’s a buzz killer.

Drinks Consumed--Brandy Alexander (brandy, crème de cacao), Scotch, rye, gin, beer, various unnamed cocktails

Intoxicating Effects--Slurred speech, staggering, stumbling, sneaking sips, the giggles, destruction of property, hangover, and delirium tremens

Potent Quotables--KIRSTEN (rationalizing): A couple of drinks--
JOE: We have more than a couple of drinks. We get drunk! Then we stay drunk most of the time. Look at that dump that we live in and the clothes that we wear… We send that child off to school like she’s… Look at me. I’m a drunk, and I don’t do my job, and that’s it!

Video Availability--Days of Wine and Roses DVD (Warner Brothers)

Similarly Sauced Cinema--Blake Edwards also used liquid overindulgence as a theme in several of his later comedies, including 10 (1979), Blind Date (1987), and Skin Deep (1989).

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